Friday, March 6, 2009


Well it's official. I am a Dad. My daughter was born February 28, 2008 at 2:11 a.m. But before you congratulate me, let me finish the story. Baby girl arrived 10 weeks earlier than her due date and the whole "premature/preterm" birth thing has my mind all cloudy and jumbled with crazy thoughts, expectations and worries.

One thing that I've struggled with a little bit is all of the "congrats" we've received. I guess in my mind I would rather everyone save their congrats for when we get to bring our baby home which could be months from now. Unlike my significant other, I try to stay away from the stories or the statitics about premature babies because I don't need the external info that might make me get my hopes up or put me in a worse mood than I'm in already.

I like to think of my baby girl as an original. The standard operating procedures don't apply to her because she may progress or recuperate differently than the babies you've read about before. It's all about optimism and outside influences have a way of dampening that sometimes.

So far the Docs say she's doing well, breathing very well on her own, digesting mom's milk and just really moving along at the top of her class (other babies born at 27 weeks) and as long as I continue to get reports like that, I'm right as rain.

But it's scary. Scary to fall in love so quickly just to...well, you know.

But the bright spot in all of this (other than my teeny tiny baby girl) is that in times like this you really know who holds you in their hearts. Friends and family that call everyday to check on baby and mom, parents and grandparents that make sure you're eating and that your home is comfortable, and everyone else who gives you strength and motivation just by letting you know they care. Not to sound too sappy, but it's an amazing thing to really REALLY know that you're loved. If I think about it too long it might even make me shed a tear or two so I try not to. But I recognize that love truly is a blessing.

Just like my daughter... ;-)



Asara Dragoness said...

Welcome to a whole new adventure. 2:11 am.. ouch! That had to be a marathon night for you. Try to get some rest, don't over-think things yet, and definitely don't worry until the doctor tells you there's a reason for it. Dragon babies are special things, you'll see!

Many *hugs* for you and your family.

Ian said...

I can't believe I didn't know about this before now. I'm a pretty shitty friend. That being said, I wish the very best to your daughter and her two loving parents. I hope you can bring her home soon and join me in the adventure that is fatherhood.
And congratulations, Brother Dragon. Baby Dragon has your strength; she'll be fine.

Robin said...

Oh, Lav....a baby girl!

I'll be lighting extra candles and saying extra prayers~ but I'm bettin' you all will be just fine.

Is Zari her name? It's beautiful.

Kiyotoe said...

dragoness: you're right, that Dragon blood is strong! ;-) Thanks.

EDog: No worries brotha, I haven't made much fuss about it although her mom has made quite the spectacle on Facebook. I look forward to asking for fatherhood advice from such a grizzled veteran such as yourself. Thanks man.

Spark: Yes, a baby girl. Can't wait to see how that'll change me and my ways. Whew. Yes, Zari (rhymes with Atari) is her name. Zari Renee. Glad you like it ;-)and thank you for the prayers. Keep 'em coming.

paz y amor said...

Hey man, you know we're keeping you, Lil' Z (that's ATLien for "Zari")and Tee Tee in our thoughts daily. We'll be up there Sunday and since you all probably need some food, we'll bring the organic carrots we just picked from the backyard...and you BETTER eat em too! :)

Asara Dragoness said...

Hee hee, my baby girl's middle name is Renee too. Awesome!

Anonymous said...

This was much sooner than I was expecting the announcement, but still - your daughter! I know it's scary, but this is where all the amazing advances are going to come in handy. I have a good friend whose baby was born at 27 weeks and 14 years later she is just fine. And here's a statistic you will like: preemie girls fare far better than preemie boys. They are tougher and more resilient. But until she is out of the woods, I am holding all three of you in my heart.

unokhan said...

will be thinkin bout ya in the days ahead....stay patient and steady

unokhan said...

4got to say -- that's a beautiful name

Kiyotoe said...

paz: i know brotha, and we appreciate it.

Dragoness: Great minds...and that's my mom's middle name. ;-)

Teach: Imagine our surprise at how soon she showed up on the scene. And yes, I luv that stat. thanks Teach.

uno: thanks for that. And i wish i could take credit for the name, but her mom picked it. If she'd been a boy it would have been my choice....

Anne said...

I like the name a lot.

You're right, every person is an individual, especially babies. So no stories or statistics, just good thoughts and prayers.

noisysmile said...

Robin said to keep you, and I trust her insight more than just about everyone I know. It looks like you are a Robin lover too (there's a lot of us).

And this post being the first I read on your blog? Wow. What a magical time in your life. Her name is beautiful. I hope you post pictures, but I understand if you don't.

Nice to meet you.

Robin said...

So, are things?

Robin said...

Got your message.

I'm so glad you are following me.

I bet, now that months have passed you realize you are the best Dad in the world.

I'm fairly certain you are the best invisible friend a person could have.

Tell me things. Life here is the same. We are struggling, but I think we are loving each other more than we did.

I couldn't figure out why so I decided it was better not to ask.

I CAN say that my heart sings when I hear from you.

My heart sings.